PARACULTURAL CALENDAR FOR APRIL 23

On this day in 1985, the Coca-Cola Company changes its formula and releases New Coke. The response was originally mixed, but soon became overwhelmingly negative, forcing Coca-Cola to revert to the original formula in less than 3 months… or did they? Coke’s sudden about-face on New Coke led to a number of conspiracy theories to help explain how one of the world’s biggest companies could make such a huge blunder. The three most popular theories are as follows: 

1. The company WANTED the new formula to fail, knowing consumers would cause a storm of controversy and demand the original formula’s return.

2. The change provided cover for the removal of coca derivatives from the product, in order to placate the Drug Enforcement Administration, which was trying to eradicate the cocaine-producing plant worldwide.

3. It was a double-switcheroo, concocted to cover the change from sugar-sweetened Coke to less expensive high fructose corn syrup.

Seeing as Coke did switch to HFCS when the brought back the “original” recipe, and seeing as the U.S. sugar trade association took out full-page ads letting consumers know about this switch when it happened, I’d say that this is one conspiracy theory that we can safely assume to be conspiracy fact. This, despite the fact that Coke’s CEO at the time replied to these theories by saying: "We're not that dumb, and we're not that smart.”

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Speaking of “new formulas”, it was on this day in 1984 that researcher Robert Gallo of the US National Cancer Institute “found” HIV, the retrovirus that causes AIDS. Soon thereafter, researcher Luc Montagnier of the Pasteur Institute in France filed a lawsuit claiming he discovered AIDS first, and that Gallo had stolen the virus after it was sent to his lab for study. Anyway, if you’re one of those blinded-by-the-Enlightenment “skeptics” who refuses to even consider the possibility that the AIDS epidemic is a man-made bioweapon created for the most sinister of all imaginable purposes, I suggest you read this eye-opening editorial… just for starters, anyway.

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On this day in 2005, the first ever YouTube video is uploaded, titled "Me at the zoo".

PARACULTURAL CALENDAR FOR APRIL 15

On this day in 1896, the first Olympic Games of the Modern Era come to a close in Athens, Greece, with a relatively simple closing ceremony. First-place winners didn't win gold medals, but silver ones creepily stamped with the big, staring face of Greek pagan deity Zeus. Second-place winners got copper medals. Third-place got a handshake and a signed, autographed picture of His Royal Majesty Lord Jack Fucking Squat.

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On this day in 1955, milkshake-machine salesman Ray Kroc opens the doors to his first franchise of a McDonald's Brothers restaurant in Des Plaines, Illinois. The McDonald's restaurant chain dates its founding to this day.

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On this day in 1989, protesters begin gathering in Tienanmen Square in the People's Republic of China to commemorate the death of the recently ousted and publicly humiliated General Secretary Hu Yaobang, who was relatively liberal and reform-minded by Chinese standards. The protests would grow and intensify until June 4, at which point all Hell broke loose.

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And now for some birthday announcements:

On April 15, in 1452, Renaissance painter, sculptor, engineer, scientist, mathematician, anatomist, geologist, cartographer, inventor, musician and all-around super-genius Leonardo da Vinci is born. Seventeen years later, in the Punjab, Nanak Dev is born. He will go on to found the Sikh religion and be its first Guru. The dictionary is born on this day in 1755, when Samuel Johnson's A Dictionary of the English Language is first published in London. The General Electric Company is founded on this day in 1892, and since corporations have the same rights as human beings nowadays, I guess it's only fitting that this event be listed as a birthday. In 1920, psychiatrist and humanist Thomas Szasz is born. He later emerges as one of the most eloquent voices speaking out against the mis-use and abuse of science, reason and medicine as a tool for social control. The road atlas was born on this day on 1924, when Rand McNally publishes the first book of its kind. In 1942, Bush Crime Family crony Kenny-Boy Lay is born... Enron ensues. And, finally, on this day in 1970, exactly nine months after his parents consummate their wedding vows while bathed in the flickering glow of a Niagara Falls motel room TV set reporting the stupendous news that two human beings were actually walking on the goddamn Moon... yer old pal Jerky is born while a clown was watching Sesame Street.

THE BEHEADING OF NICK BERG

This longer-than-normal think-piece was originally written by yer old pal Jerky for the Daily Dirt in May of 2004, shortly after the beheading of young American businessman Nick Berg. Some of the links feature video footage of a truly disturbing and soul-damaging nature, so please be advised. This is not a joke. - YOPJ

THE FUNGUS AMONG US

Conspiracy theories. They've always been with us, but now, more than ever before, they're everywhere. Under an increasingly paranoid regime that strives to impose secrecy and micro-manage information - even attempting to shape the laws of nature by "maligning, distorting or manipulating" politically embarrassing science data - this is unavoidable. Like mushrooms, conspiracy theories thrive in the dark. And, like mushrooms, some of them can spark a "bad trip", complete with mind-warping hallucinations, violent seizures, and projectile vomiting.

"ZOMG DA SEE-EYE-AYE MIGHTA KNOWN ABOUT DA NINE-WUN-WUN!"

This article is the very definition of the expression "limited hangout", and is insulting to the intelligence of all who read it.

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KILL A COP?

Don't act all offended, just open your mind and read this article, because - all things considered - it asks a difficult question that I have a sinking feeling more and more of us are going to be forced to contemplate in the very near future.

INTERNET PIRACY - NOT AS BAD AS THEY SAY?

"Is piracy really sending the entertainment industry broke or are the claimed hundreds of millions of dollars in annual losses and thousands of job cuts just a load of hogwash? The industry is constantly warning of an impending piracy apocalypse but continues to notch up healthy revenues and record box office takings. ... With the industry reeling after repeatedly failing to use the courts to force internet providers to penalise illegal downloaders, it is now trying to persuade the government to implement new legislation that would crack down on internet users. But critics say the industry isn't playing fair and should refresh its business model for the digital age instead of stretching the truth in order to scare the government into implementing knee-jerk legislation."

CONTINUED...

Thanks to our old pal DaddyBear for the link! - YOPJ