Friday, September 19, 2014

RIVAL SATANIC CHURCHES DUKE IT OUT IN DETROIT!


In a development reminiscent of the feud between the Judean People's Front and the People's Front of Judea in Monty Python's classic satire The Life of Brian, two rival "Satanic" churches laying claim to the post-Apocalyptic necropolis of Detroit - the Satanic Temple and the Temples of Satan - are engaged in a public hissy fit over a number of doctrinal controversies. In particular, representatives for the Temples of Satan contend that the Satanic Temple are just a bunch of atheistic poseurs who have unfairly co-opted the bad-ass iconography that most of the world at large rightly associates with their Main Man, the Great Deceiver Himself, SATAN!
"They are not Satanists," Cindy Fleming of the Oxford, Mich.-based Temples of Satan told the Free Press regarding the Satanic Temple. "If they want to speak on behalf of a political agenda, they need to do it as the atheists they are. They do not need to use a religion. They don’t believe in anything, any religion — so why are they using a religion to do it? That is hypocritical, it’s an oxymoron and it’s not even credible."
In other Satanic news, the Orlando Weekly reports that "the Satanic Temple announced it will distribute literature in Florida public schools in response to the school board's decision to allow Evangelical materials to be distributed on school grounds."

Of course, there's no way of knowing which of these "churches" the Devil prefers... but it's pretty clear which of them is Number One as far as getting their "bad works" written about in the mainstream media.

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