On this day in
1570, a group of Spanish Jesuits led by
Fray Batista Segura arrives in the Chesapeake Bay area of Virginia in order to convert the native "savages" there to Christianity. Six months later, the entire group was slaughtered by the very Indians they had come to evangelize. BURN!
***
On this day in
1583, Sir
Humphrey Gilbert establishes the first English colony in North America at what is now St. John's, Newfoundland.
***
On this day in
1735,
New York Weekly Journal writer
John Peter Zenger is acquitted of “seditious libel” against the royal governor of New York because what he had published was, in fact, true.
***
On this day in
1861, in order to help pay for the Civil War, the United States government levies the first ever
income tax as part of the Revenue Act of 1861. Back then, you had to give the US government 3% of all incomes over and above $800.
***
On this day in
1861, the United States Army abolishes flogging. Chaos ensues.
***
On this day in
1882, Standard Oil of New Jersey is established. It is more widely known across the globe as
Exxon and or
Esso, one of the most evil, conspiracy-encrusted corporations in history, run by one of the most evil, conspiracy-encrusted families in history... the
Rockefellers.
***
On this day in
1944, the Nazis begin a week-long massacre of anywhere between 40,000 and 100,000 civilians and prisoners of war in Wola, Poland.
***
On this day in
1957,
American Bandstand debuts on the ABC television network. The show is dedicated to teenage baby-boomers, playing the songs and showing popular dances of the time. The show’s Dorian Grey-like host,
Dick Clark, didn’t age a day during the show’s half-century run.
***
Goodbye, Norma Jean. The once and future
Marilyn Monroe blows out her own candle with a fistful of barbiturates on this day in
1962, thus selflessly sparing us, the public, from having to witness her long, sad decline into decrepitude. Meanwhile, half a world away, in South Africa, freedom fighter
Nelson Mandela is thrown in jail. He would not emerge from captivity until 28 years later, in 1990.
***
On this day in
1981, US President
Ronald Reagan fires 11,359 striking air-traffic controllers who ignored his presidential declaration that they had to return to work, or else.
***
On this day in
2012, some asshole by the name of
Wade Michael Page walks into a Sikh temple in Oak Creek, Wisconsin, and opens fire, killing six people. Eventually, he shoots himself in the head after being wounded by police during the post-massacre standoff.
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