Friday, September 23, 2016

PARACULTURAL CALENDAR FOR SEPTEMBER 23



On this day in the year 1875, 15-year-old Billy the Kid gets thrown in jail for the first time in his life, after stealing a bag of clothes from a Chinese laundryman as a joke. Despite his crippling claustrophobia, Billy managed to escape prison by squeezing through the chimney. For the rest of his days, Billy would be on the wrong side of the law.

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On this day in 1889, Nintendo Koppai - later Nintendo Company Ltd - is founded by Fusajiro Yamauchi to produce and market the playing card game Hanafuda.

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On this day in 1909, The Phantom of the Opera, a novel by French writer Gaston Leroux, is first published as a serialization in Le Gaulois.

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On this day in 1952, Richard Nixon makes his "Checkers speech", in which he references his dog, Checkers.

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On this day in 1969, the Chicago Eight trial opens in - where else? - Chicago!

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On this day in 1976, Republican Presidential candidate Gerald Ford debates Democratic Presidential candidate Jimmy Carter on live television. Chaos ensues.

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On this day in 1977, Cheryl Ladd replaces Farrah Fawcett on Charlie's Angels. The millions of teenage boys who make up the show's target demographic briefly pause, shrug, then resume masturbating.

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On this day in 2008, the Kauhajoki school shooting takes place when Matti Saari kills 10 people before committing suicide.

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On this day in the year 1846, astronomers discover our solar system's eighth planet, Neptune, by extrapolating potential orbits based on some of the more unusual aspects of... Uranus. You see, it was hypothesized that, due to the way it moved, there had to be something behind... Uranus. It has subsequently been noted that Neptune is smaller in diameter, but larger in mass, than... Uranus. Which must be why you go through so much toilet paper, you fat tub of lard!

PS - Who would have thought Uranus could be so beautiful?

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